Sacred Rivers

Packrafting=freedom

2011-07-04T22:42:00.001-04:00

Happy 4th of July blog universe. I just got a brand new Alpacka raft, the Yukon Yak. I haven't named it yet. not sure if it is a he or a she just yet. I will see how it acts in whitewater to decide its sexual orientation.

I took it out on my river and it is such a feeling of freedom!!! Lyme disease has limited so much of what I can do so having this new toy is opening up my world!

Back!

2011-03-19T03:23:00.011-04:00

Ok so, life has changed a bit since my last post. New life, new home, new everything!

All for the better! Love it.

Some of the highlights of life's changes here in pictures. In no particular order, but all with special meaning!

The Lorax is back and better than ever!

2009-12-31T15:19:00.001-05:00

"This is the beginning of a new day. You have been given this day to use as you will. You can waste it or use it for good. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it. When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever; in its place is something that you have left behind...let it be something good."

That time of year again!

2009-11-25T01:55:00.001-05:00

Out from Under

2009-10-10T21:55:00.002-04:00

Breathe you out, breathe you in
You keep coming back to tell me
You're the one who could have been

And my eyes, see it all so clear
It was long ago and far away, but it never disappears
I try to put it in the past, hold on to myself
And don't look back

I don't wanna dream about, all the things that never were
And maybe I can live without, when I'm out from under
I don't wanna feel the pain, what good would it do me now?
I'll get it all figured out, when I'm out from under
(From under, from under, from under)

So let me go, just let me fly away
Let me feel the space between us, growin' deeper
And much darker everyday

Watch me now, and I'll be someone new
My heart will be unbroken, it will open up
For everyone but you
Even when I cross the line, it's like a lie I've told a thousand times

I don't wanna dream about, all the things that never were
Maybe I can live without, when I'm out from under
I don't wanna feel the pain, what good would it do me now?
I'll get it all figured out, when I'm out from under
(From under, from under, from under, from under)

A part of me still believes when you, say you're gonna stick around
A part of me still believes we can, find a way to work it out
But I know that we tried everything we could try so let's just, say goodbye
Forever...

I don't wanna dream about, all the things that never were
And maybe I can live without, when I'm out from under
And I don't wanna feel the pain, what good would it do me now?
I'll get it all figured out, when I'm out from under

I don't wanna dream about, all the things that never were
And maybe I can live without, when I'm out from under
And I don't wanna feel the pain, what good would it do me now?
I'll get it all figured out, when I'm out from under
(From under, from under, from under, from under)

Out From Under by Britney Spears

Don't Go Away

2009-08-23T21:36:00.000-04:00

I refuse to be CAGED!! There are all different kinds of confinement! There is confinement of the spirit, then there is confinement within the body, which I know all too well. The trick is to be able to see which confining circumstances you can control, and change them if you are not happy. Life is too short, Live it, live it extraordinary!

Western awesomeness

2009-08-23T16:01:00.002-04:00

The West rules...!!!!!

Special Sparkle

2009-05-11T01:48:00.002-04:00

A good friend of mine shared this with me tonight...i wanted to put it here to remember it.

"I believe that we have more than one soulmate on the planet. If we're lucky, we end up marrying one of them. The rest remain as friends with a sort of special sparkle. I've always thought of you in this way and hope someday you'll get to meet the soulmate I ended up marrying."

Yay!!

2009-04-27T16:53:00.001-04:00

ILPVVVF!

Before the Night Ends

2009-03-26T17:15:00.001-04:00

I close my eyes to see the world
I close my eyes so that it won't hurt
I'm sailing on blue ocean and flying to you

I catch my breathe under the full moon
A star that shines, so pleased to meet...you
Maybe I'll dream forever
And I'd like to love right here

Before the night ends
And dawn of a new day dawns
How I hope, how I hope
That out of this endless blue
Somehow I will find you
Before the night ends,
Before the night ends

I made a choice more than a few times
To walk a road that didn't end up so right
But I want to go the distance
I'd like to love right here

Before the night ends
And dawn of a new day dawns
How I hope, how I hope
That out of this endless blue
Somehow I will find you
Before the night ends,
Before the night ends

Close my eyes...
Never gonna let up...

Before the night ends
I hope I find you

Theory Of Every Thing" Lesslie Millis Provided By Sherry And Sarah "

Life is a miracle,
There's a theory for everything..
Like a flower that is growing up from a stone,
I want to protect you,
I want you to flourish,
But some directions you have to
Figure out on your own
ahhh,ahhh,ahhahaohahha

I wonder how freely you would imagine the scenery,
You'd write a kingdom, you were a princess of love..
But time can get jaded,
People will wonder
Cause there is a theory for everything,
Right or wrong
..ahhha,ahahaha,
a theory for everything, a theory for everything

All the memories the music,
And all the music the future
And the Theory of Everything is nothing without love...
The theory of everything is nothing without love...
Ooo...Ahhhh
Ooo...Ahhhh
I love who you are
The theory you want to be
Of all the choice in this world
I hope you will believe...
Everything, everything, theory of everything,
Everything, everything, theory of everything,
Ooo...Ahhh
Ooo...Ahhh
The theory of everything is nothing without love...
The theory of everything is nothing without love...

"Kill Me With Your Love" Chloe Provided By Sarah

Tell me who you are today
Did you leave the best with the words you won't say
Different man, different heart
Now we stand worlds and worlds apart

Underneath the ruins that lie
A broken rhythm keeps running through my mind
Color it is all I see
But I don't bother the remains of you and me

And I trust you to kill me with your love
Your words mean nothing at all
I trust you to kill me with your love
Your words mean nothing at all

Lives touched with lies in this room
Vacant memories haunt me through and through
Descending from this high
Silence fills the void with a fire dye

And I trust you to kill me with your love
Your words mean nothing at all
I trust you to kill me with your love
Your words mean nothing at all

And I trust you to kill me with your love
Your words mean nothing at all
I trust you to kill me with your love
Your words mean nothing at all

Your words mean nothing at all
And I trust you to kill me with your love
Your words mean nothing at all
I trust you to kill me with your love
Your words mean nothing at all

Cheney gets owned!!

2009-02-11T15:33:00.000-05:00

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

Amidst the falling snow

2009-01-18T12:52:00.003-05:00

I love the falling snow! This winter there is a ton of it..at least 3 feet in my yard right now. Ahh Nostalgia

A New Year

2009-01-01T01:35:00.002-05:00

New Year's 2009
Life's not about expecting, hoping and wishing, it's about doing, being and becoming.

It's about the choices you've just made, and the ones you're about to make, it's about the things you choose to say - today.

Sky in Motion

2008-12-31T02:06:00.000-05:00

túrána hott kurdís by hasta la otra méxico! from Till Credner on Vimeo.

Merry Christmas!!!

2008-12-28T14:24:00.000-05:00

a Proper Christmas Song!!

Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald

2008-12-22T22:19:00.003-05:00

I decided I like this song and that it needs to be here. Deal with it.

Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald
Music and lyrics ©1976 by Gordon Lightfoot

The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down
of the big lake they called "Gitche Gumee."
The lake, it is said, never gives up her dead
when the skies of November turn gloomy.
With a load of iron ore twenty-six thousand tons more
than the Edmund Fitzgerald weighed empty,
that good ship and true was a bone to be chewed
when the "Gales of November" came early.

The ship was the pride of the American side
coming back from some mill in Wisconsin.
As the big freighters go, it was bigger than most
with a crew and good captain well seasoned,
concluding some terms with a couple of steel firms
when they left fully loaded for Cleveland.
And later that night when the ship's bell rang,
could it be the north wind they'd been feelin'?

The wind in the wires made a tattle-tale sound
and a wave broke over the railing.
And ev'ry man knew, as the captain did too
'twas the witch of November come stealin'.
The dawn came late and the breakfast had to wait
when the Gales of November came slashin'.
When afternoon came it was freezin' rain
in the face of a hurricane west wind.

When suppertime came the old cook came on deck sayin'.
"Fellas, it's too rough t'feed ya."
At seven P.M. a main hatchway caved in; he said,
"Fellas, it's bin good t'know ya!"
The captain wired in he had water comin' in
and the good ship and crew was in peril.
And later that night when 'is lights went outta sight
came the wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald.

Does any one know where the love of God goes
when the waves turn the minutes to hours?
The searchers all say they'd have made Whitefish Bay
if they'd put fifteen more miles behind 'er.
They might have split up or they might have capsized;
they may have broke deep and took water.
And all that remains is the faces and the names
of the wives and the sons and the daughters.

Lake Huron rolls, Superior sings
in the rooms of her ice-water mansion.
Old Michigan steams like a young man's dreams;
the islands and bays are for sportsmen.
And farther below Lake Ontario
takes in what Lake Erie can send her,
And the iron boats go as the mariners all know
with the Gales of November remembered.

In a musty old hall in Detroit they prayed,
in the "Maritime Sailors' Cathedral."
The church bell chimed 'til it rang twenty-nine times
for each man on the Edmund Fitzgerald.
The legend lives on from the Chippewa on down
of the big lake they call "Gitche Gumee."
"Superior," they said, "never gives up her dead
when the gales of November come early!"

Banff Film Festival

2008-12-03T17:30:00.003-05:00

The new trailer is up for 2009!!!
Tour Schedule http://www.banffmountainfestivals.ca/tour/

http://www.youtube.com/user/TheBanffCentre

The River Dance

2008-11-29T14:35:00.002-05:00

The River by Garth Brooks

You know a dream is like a river
Ever changin' as it flows
And a dreamer's just a vessel
That must follow where it goes
Trying to learn from what's behind you
And never knowing what's in store
Makes each day a constant battle
Just to stay between the shores.. and

I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I'll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry

Too many times we stand aside
And let the waters slip away
'Til what we put off 'til tomorrow
Has now become today
So don't you sit upon the shoreline
And say you're satisfied
Choose to chance the rapids
And dare to dance the tide.. yes

I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I'll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry

And there's bound to be rough waters
And I know I'll take some falls
But with the good Lord as my captain
I can make it through them all.. yes

I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry
Like a bird upon the wind
These waters are my sky
I'll never reach my destination
If I never try
So I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry

Yes, I will sail my vessel
'Til the river runs dry
'Til the river runs dry

The Dance...isn't necessarily a Dance at all...it's life...the "Dance" of life...
if you aren't shallow enough to "get it" the hidden meaning, you'll notice there's a deep emotional meaning about life, and how short it is...in these lyrics.

Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared 'neath the stars alone
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye

And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance

Holding you I held everything
For a moment wasn't I a king
But if I'd only known how the king would fall
Hey who's to say you know I might have chanced it all

And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance

Yes my life is better left to chance
I could have missed the pain but I'd of had to miss the dance

Thanks

2008-11-26T14:59:00.000-05:00

Thanks to Jen for sending me this!

For the teenager who is not doing dishes but is watching TV, because that means he is at home and not on the streets.

* For the taxes I pay, because it means that I am employed.

* For the mess to clean after a party, because it means that I have been surrounded by friends.

* For the clothes that fit a little too snug, because it means I have enough to eat.

* For my shadow that watches me work, because it means I am out in the sunshine.

* For a lawn that needs mowing, windows that need cleaning, and gutters that need fixing, because it means I have a home.

* For all the complaining I hear about the government, because it means that we have freedom of speech.

* For the parking spot I find at the far end of the parking lot, because it means I am capable of walking, and that I have been blessed with transportation.

* For my huge heating bill, because it means I am warm.

* For the lady behind me in my place of worship when she sings off key, because it means that I can hear.

* For the pile of laundry and ironing, because it means I have clothes to wear.

* For weariness and aching muscles at the end of the day, because it means I have been capable of working hard.

* For the alarm that goes off in the early morning hours, because it means that I am alive.

and finally....

* For too much e-mail, because it means I have friends who are thinking of me.

Don't Give up!

2008-11-15T15:25:00.003-05:00

One of the best songs I've heard in a long time...with an equally amazing video by Josh Groban.

007

2008-11-11T17:18:00.005-05:00

Rant on... James Bond! Roger Moore has failed me and now I refuse to watch any of his fail 007 shit! He has NO clue what HOTNESS is in any way, shape, form, clusterfuckage...he stands up too straight and Jaws was more interesting to watch than he was. This is FAIL... He cries! Somebody explain to me how..and WHY James Bond..is CRYING, and about all things, he is crying about VIOLENCE!! Your supposed to be a secret agent, your job is to kill people and you are whining about the new James Bond movies becoming "too violent". What a fag! Look at that siisy gun and the fag way he is holding it! FAIL!

Roger Moore dislikes the more violent James Bond
Tuesday November 11 12:45 PM ET

Movie audiences nowadays expect scenes of graphic violence in James Bond movies, unlike when Roger Moore

"I am happy to have done it, but I'm sad that it has turned so violent," Moore said before "Quantum of Solace," starring Daniel Craig as a darker Agent 007, opens in North America on Friday.

"That's keeping up with the times, it's what cinema-goers seem to want and it's proved by the box-office figures," Moore told Reuters in an interview about his memoir, "My Word is My Bond."

THE REAL JAMES BOND ...ooozes hotness and isn't afraid to get dirty and violent!

The REAL BOND!!! Avenging Vesper's death!

Riding and packrafting in Alaska

2008-10-27T10:32:00.001-04:00

My bro is hot shit! We're all famous now!

http://www.adn.com/outdoors/story/567822.html

Riding and packrafting Alaska's 'Lost Coast'

Adventurers dodge disaster in the Hubbard Gap

By MELISSA DeVAUGHN
mdevaughn@adn.com

Published: October 25th, 2008 07:08 PM
Last Modified: October 25th, 2008 09:10 PM

Before launching their packrafts in the iceberg-studded, swirling chaos of Hubbard Gap, Eric Parsons and Dylan Kentch agreed they would have each other's backs. If one got into trouble paddling their small rafts through the swirling water, the other would try to come to the rescue.

Click to enlarge

But, said Parsons, a 32 year old engineer by trade but adventurer by passion, "as soon as we hit the water, that kind of went out the window."

"We were like little photons in a neuron generator," said Kentch, 24.

Swells were enormous. The glacier was calving and the icebergs were scudding through the water like torpedoes. It was all the two could do to stay upright, trying to paddle their cumbersome bike-laden packrafts. For 15 minutes they battled the waves, fighting forward inch by inch until, finally, being safely spit out in the open water.

Beyond, the Hubbard Gap, the icy maelstrom was gone, replaced by clear skies and flat water that allowed them to enjoy the rest of the day.

"That was a religious experience," Parsons said, still shaking his head weeks later at the memory.

The Anchorage pair is back in town now, after last month completing a wild, 300-mile adventure combining mountain biking with packrafting, from Yakutat to Cordova.

They followed what is called the Lost Coast, pedaling fat-tired Surly Pugsleys across sandy beaches when conditions were right and blowing up tiny packrafts and loading the bikes on top when water crossings were warranted.

The 19-day adventure was everything they had hoped -- some great wilderness riding, a little of the unknown with weather and navigational challenges and lots of "Oh, wow!" moments of incredible beauty and solitude.

"Every day, it was like something crazy would happen, and we'd think, 'That was nuts,' " said Parsons, who's already beginning to hatch plans for a similar Arctic-based adventure.

The trek began Aug. 19 from Yakutat. The pair walked and biked for about two days in fairly good weather until reaching Disenchantment Bay, where their rude awakening to dangerous water travel at Hubbard Glacier and the Gap would take place. Friends who had passed through the area on their own trek months before told Parsons the Gap was easy, a simple float to open ocean and easy paddling.

But conditions deteriorated, whipping up foul weather and turning the narrow gap into a cauldron of danger.

"When we got there, it was floatable. But within a half hour, there were so many icebergs you couldn't float it at all," Kentch said.

So the pair decided to wait it out, setting up camp and building a fire in the hope that conditions would improve the next day.

When that didn't happen, they opted for Plan B -- to bushwhack with their 30-pound, fat-tired bikes and backpacks through dense foliage around the Gap.

"It was impossible," Parsons said. "Bushwhacking with bikes is hard, and 10 hours later, we hadn't even gone a mile."

They stopped again, discouraged but nowhere near giving up. In fact, the thought of giving up never entered their minds. They just kept thinking of options.

Finally, one presented itself.

SHOOTING THE GAP

"We found a gully that dropped down to the water, and paddled through the Gap as fast as we could," Parsons added.

Paddling through the Gap, which on their blog, lostcoastbike.blogspot.com, they renamed "Terror Gap," took only about 15 minutes. But it seemed epic, the two agree.

Once safely away from the bottleneck and with the experience behind them, they were able to relax and enjoy the rest of the day.

"It was 60 (degrees) and blue skies; it was a nice day," Kentch said. "It was very gentle ocean paddling.

"We made some coffee and we just paddled across and saw four grizzly bears in an hour."

The wildlife sitings were not isolated, the men said. They routinely saw bears, or signs of them, but nothing bothered them. And they never felt threatened.

Just a few days later, Parsons and Kentch were making steady progress, swapping between pedaling and packrafting, in good weather and foul. They found an old fishing cabin and holed up against the rain, not continuing their journey until the following morning.

But just a few minutes into riding, something went wrong

"My bike made this full crunching noise," Parsons said. "I knew that was not good. The chain ring bolts had loosened and the pedaling force had ripped the chain ring entirely off."

It was in two pieces.

And a bike can't operate without one.

Fortunately, the men had a satellite phone with them and called Anchorage bike shop owner Greg Matyas at Speedway Cycles in Spenard. Over the static of hundreds of miles of wilderness, Parsons relayed the problem, and Matyas said he could help.

"I did what was necessary to get them back on the trail again," Matyas said. "I just happened to have the parts in that he needed, and I had it Gold Streaked (Alaska Airlines package delivery service) down to Yakutat."

From there, Parsons arranged to get a Bush plane to drop the parts on the beach. Within 20 hours, the two were on their way again.

And that's how their days went, from one challenge to the next.

NOTHING ASSUMED

"Things that we thought were going to be easy were hard, and things we thought would be hard were easy," Parsons said. "When we got to Icy Bay, which we thought was going to be tough, it was perfectly calm with no ice and we paddled across it in four hours."

"We thought crossing the Copper River Delta was going to be really hard ... and we anticipated lots of mud and marshland," Kentch said. "But the sand was really firm, and we could ride for long stretches."

Then there would be the challenging days -- such as boulder-picking their way across the beach along Sitkagi Bluffs, pushing and carrying their bikes over the rocks.

"But then the next day we had some of the best riding on the whole trip," Parsons said.

On balance, it was the trip of a lifetime, they said.

And 40 pounds of cookie dough fueled it. "We had no stove, and the cookie dough is like half butter, half oats, so it's pretty efficient," said a rail-thin Kentch.

Kim Menster, a Cordova gillnetter who came upon them in Controller Bay at a place the locals call Barney's Hole, said she was impressed by their lack of pretension. She ultimately helped them cross the bay in bad seas to safely deliver them to Kanak Island. Later, she hosted them at her Cordova home.

"They were so nice, they just really had good attitudes," she said. "When you meet these adventurous types, you expect macho kinds of guys who are like, 'Here we are.' But they weren't like that at all."

Instead, she said, they just took each day in stride. The morning after meeting them while anchored up at Barney's Hole, she went ashore to check on them.

"You think of adventure people and you expect them to be up at the crack of dawn," she said.

Not so for Parsons and Kentch, who at 9:30 a.m. were nowhere to be found, she said. Later they rolled out of bed, rubbing their eyes and thinking about the day ahead.

"It's amazing the amount of food that little guy (Kentch) can pack in," Menster added. "Eric's (easily 20 pounds heavier and several inches taller) eating a little bit of cheese and a little bit of cookie dough, but Dylan's just in the background eating cookie dough like a machine, packing in the calories."

Within days, Parsons and Kentch became well known among the commercial fishermen, who were just gearing up for silver salmon season and had gotten word of the adventure through radio communication among the boats. While the occasional birder or kayaker can be found in the area, two guys on bikes with packrafts was a definite anomaly.

"We joked about that a lot on the radio, how we go out and we fish and it's kind of a pretty intense thing," she said. "But then fishermen hear about them riding their bikes from Yakutat and they say, 'That's crazy!' These (fishermen) are people who go out in huge seas; they don't think what they do is crazy at all."

Matyas said it takes a certain person to take on wilderness treks such as the Lost Coast trip; Kentch and Parsons fit the mold perfectly.

"I think they're opening up new ground (for adventure travel)," he said. "There is huge opportunity for beach riding there.

"They had a pretty difficult task of carrying everything in their packrafts and crossing open water. But both of those guys have that kind of mind set -- you've got to be flexible, adaptable and have the right temperament to deal with the problems that might arise.

"They're definitely tough guys."

Diva and Conquer

2008-10-27T08:13:00.001-04:00

Mountain Hardwear's Outdoor Diva Contest

My Mom won First Prize!!!!!!! I have been spawned from greatness! Yay it's been a year since you won this! beat out all the younger wannabes http://blog.mountainhardwear.com/divas/

http://blog.mountainhardwear.com/divas/2007/10/henrietta_has_boundless_energy.html

Outdoor Diva Henrietta Parsons

Henrietta has boundless energy and a contagious high spirit! Her frequent trips to the gym make her physically fit, she bikes, hikes, kayaks, snowshoes and x-c skis.

Henrietta raised two children to love and respect the outdoors. For 11 years she acted as Alpine Club adviser for the high school Alpine Club. She was a guide for The Mountain Workshop, taking young people to wild destinations for 12 years. She has guided a women's group on several trips to the remote canyons of the Southwest. Backpacking the John Muir Trail, Mount Rainier, the A.T. and trails in Switzerland is what excites her.

Henrietta's proudest moment is when she viewed Mt. Everest from the surrounding peaks on a month long trip to the Everest valleys. Now she has added sea kayaking to her loves.

For 23 years she has worked for our local school system always getting the kids out for recess and educating kids and staff on how to dress to be warm and comfortable, she travels with extra fleece, polypro and hats just in case someone needs something.

In all of the above she has always stressed the need for proper clothing. Her motto was "change your clothes, not your plans," don't bring a lot of clothes, just the right layers. Henrietta believes in buying the very best because if you don't, you buy twice. She has truly educated people on how to dress. Your logo of the little bolt is part of her trademark!

She will do everything to keep her weekends and anytime off free so she can be outside. She is really adamant about this. I'm sure Mountain Hardware would be very proud to have her as their Diva.

Save the Orcas

2008-10-25T14:19:00.003-04:00

SEATTLE – Seven Puget Sound killer whales are missing and presumed dead in what could be the biggest decline among the sound's orcas in nearly a decade, say scientists who carefully track the endangered animals.

"This is a disaster," Ken Balcomb, a senior scientist at the Center for Whale Research on San Juan Island, said Friday. "The population drop is worse than the stock market."

While the official census won't be completed until December, the total number of live "southern resident" orcas now stands at 83.

Among those missing since last year's count are the nearly century-old leader of one of the three southern resident pods, and two young females who recently bore calves. The loss of the seven whales, Balcomb said, would be the biggest decline among the Puget Sound orcas since 1999, when the center also tracked a decline of seven whales.

Low numbers of chinook salmon, a prime food for these whales, may be a factor in the unusual number of deaths this year, Balcomb said.

"It was a bad salmon year and that's not good for the whales," he said. "Everybody considers these wonderful creatures, but we really have to pay attention to the food supply."

The three pods, or families, that frequent western Washington's inland marine waters — the J, K, and L pods — are genetically and behaviorally distinct from other killer whales. The sounds they make are considered a unique dialect, they mate only among themselves, eat salmon rather than marine mammals and show a unique attachment to the region.

The population reached 140 or more in the last century, but their numbers have fluctuated in recent decades. They were listed as endangered in 2005.

"We may be in the beginning of another decline in the population," said Howard Garrett, director of the Orca Network, a nonprofit education and advocacy group.

He said the whales seem to be having a harder time finding chinook salmon.

The whales recently have been traveling over greater distances than usual, suggesting they may be ranging farther for food, said Brad Hanson, a wildlife biologist with the National Marine Fisheries Service.

Lack of food may be a concern, but it's too early to know the reason for the unusual number of presumed deaths, he said.

Pollution and a decline in prey are believed to be the whales' biggest threats, although stress from whale-watching tour boats and underwater sonar tests by the Navy also have been concerns. In the late 1960s and early '70s, the population fell as dozens were captured for marine parks.

The whales were making an apparentg comeback in recent years, reaching 90 in number in 2005, "but it's been a downhill trend now for three years," Balcomb said.

Among those missing are two female whales of reproductive age, both of which recently produced calves. One of those calves, L-111, is missing, while the other, J-39, is not.

It's not unusual to lose older or younger whales, but losing two females in reproductive prime is "a bit of a concern" since they typically have a high survival rate, Hanson said.

One female whale, known to scientists as L-67, had the potential for two or three more calves, Hanson said.

She was the mother of "Luna," a juvenile killer whale from Washington waters that made headlines in 2001 when he became separated from his pod and turned up in Nootka Sound, off the west coast of Canada's Vancouver Island. A killer whale believed to be Luna died in Nootka Sound in 2006 when it was hit by the propeller of a large tugboat.

L-67 showed clear signs of emaciation — a depression behind her blow hole — before she disappeared in September, Hanson said.

"It definitely shows that she was not eating," he said, but it's unclear why. Researchers are performing tests on samples they collected from her weeks before she disappeared.

Others missing, according to the center, include K-7, the 98-year-old matriarch of K-pod, and L-101, a 6-year-old male who is a brother of "Luna."

The count also includes a calf, J-43, that was born in November but is believed to have not survived the winter.

The whale census may increase if baby orcas are born this fall. And there's a slim chance the whales may reappear elsewhere, as "Luna" did, Hanson said.

But Balcomb said: "We've been monitoring. They're just gone."

OMG the pleasure

2008-10-21T17:43:00.002-04:00

turtles!

Omg the tiger and the dog

LMAO

omfg cryin!

still cryin over when the guy says "bring out the fluffer"

rofl

omg monkey and sheep!

Oh baby!

2008-10-21T00:44:00.002-04:00

Autumn Splendor

2008-10-20T13:51:00.012-04:00

Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature's peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. The winds will blow their own freshness into you and the storms their energy, while cares will drop off like autumn leaves. - John Muir

I walked and ran thru fields of gold! lol

The island sprouter & mineral springs

the whole field had all the corn on it still, maybe the farmer died and failed to harvest...

Time to heal

2008-10-18T00:17:00.004-04:00

It takes time to heal.
To build a bridge
from now to tomorrow.
Sink the piers
deep into the Earth.
Pour in concrete
day by day,
a little at a time,
and let it set.

It takes time to heal.

It may feel very awkward,
as if you're making empty promises,
as if you're simply spanning empty space.

But someday, somehow, somewhere,
you'll find yourself
upon a brand new shore,
glancing back at the bridge
which you alone have built.

It takes time to heal.

Ted Hibbard

Blog pollution!

2008-10-16T02:48:00.007-04:00

LMAO! here ya go Eric.

nebulage

2008-10-11T16:31:00.005-04:00

Nebulas, one of the most beautiful phenomenom in the universe. I love them. Amazing...so many people don't even realize these exist!

Chipmunk suicide cult

2008-10-10T14:49:00.003-04:00

Back to being retarded!
Blog here changes without notice..deal with it...
For some reason...chipmunks seem to be dying all around me! Hudson brings 3-4 in ht house per week and leaves them for me in my bathtub! Sometimes they have heads and sometimes no tails..he does what he wants. Lil fella is brighter than i thought. Just realized today that theres a little hole under our garage door where the mice and chipmunks come inside. Genius son of mine that he is...Hudson's been upchucking his food by the hole in the door..to bait the fuckers! That's genius! So the mice come in and start eating Hudson's puke and then he catches them! yeah, i know, sorry form of entertainment. But! I just found THIS!

Look closely..its the chipmunk underwater graveyard!
I went to check on my frog pond..and found 4 dead chipmunks frozen like that under the water! Like statues! It's the funniest thing ever! Got to love the pics! I took them out...dead frogs too...the hell is going on here!!! Looks to me like the victims of a peer-induced hazing ritual. I'm sure they must have had a mass suicide cause they were so afraid of Hudson's jaws of death! haha!

True Friends

2008-10-04T00:56:00.004-04:00

Everyone should have
a friend like you
your laughter, your wisdom
heart full of kindness
you know when to offer advice
when to listen in quiet support
time after time
you've come to my rescue
brightened so many days
and time after time
I've realized how fortunate
I am that my life includes you
I really do believe that
we can help each other with the problems of life
you are like a candle
who's flame glows brighter
brighter than the stars

:) L

Think Big

2008-10-03T13:31:00.001-04:00

Walter D. Wintle (Adapted)

If you think you are beaten, you are.

If you think you dare not, you won’t.
If you like to win, but don’t think you can,
It’s almost a cinch that you won’t.

If you think you’ll lose, you’ve lost,
For out in the world you’ll find
Success begins with a person’s will;
It’s all in the state of mind.

For many a game is lost
Before even a step is run
And many a coward fails
Before his work is begun.

Think big and your deed will grow;
Think small and you will fall behind.
Think that you can and you will;
It’s all in the state of mind.

If you think that you are out-classed, you are;
You’ve got to think high to rise.
You’ve got to be sure of yourself
Before you can win the prize.

Life’s battles don't always go
To the strongest or fastest man
But sooner or later the person who wins
Is the person who thinks she can.

The Man in the Glass

2008-10-01T20:00:00.000-04:00

Peter Dale Wimbrow Sr.

When you get what you want in your struggle for self
And the world makes you king for a day
Just go to the mirror and look at yourself
And see what that man has to say.

For it isn’t your father, or mother, or wife
Whose judgment upon you must pass
The fellow whose verdict counts most in your life
Is the one staring back from the glass.

He’s the fellow to please – never mind all the rest
For he’s with you, clear to the end
And you’ve passed your most difficult, dangerous test
If the man in the glass is your friend.

You may fool the whole world down the pathway of years
And get pats on the back as you pass
But your final reward will be heartache and tears
If you’ve cheated the man in the glass.

Oneness

2008-09-29T00:00:00.000-04:00

"To the world you may be one person but to one person you may be the world."

Black Elk Speaks

2008-09-28T23:01:00.008-04:00

"The first peace, which is the most important, is that which comes within the souls of people when they realize their relationship, their oneness with the universe and all its powers, and when they realize that at the center of the universe dwells the Great Spirit, and that this center is really everywhere, it is within each of us." Black Elk

Free of spirit, body and soul
To her heart there was no key,
Captured by nothing, nothing at all
I wonder even by me.

In her veins ran the ultimate symbol
Of triumph over time,
Her beauty was a picture
Of the perfect design.

Her eyes held the ghost of ancestors
That roamed before,
Strength, courage and grace
She was to the core.

High upon a mountain
She now stands so regally,
A wisp of wind, she fades away
But not from my memory.

Where the river takes me..

2008-09-27T03:13:00.000-04:00

Arena by VnV Nation

Before me plays the endless film
Relentless splinters I recall
Each living thing breathes life
Only sentiment remains
To liquid born, from patterns formed
The sand descends with blind intent
Where the river takes me will in time be revealed

I cannot turn my feelings down
Beyond my means to turn my thoughts around
Expressed in every word I will ever speak
Brighter than all the stars combined
More than the waters, earth and sky
All that I wish and all that I dream

Above the waves with my hands raised
Dare the wind, lay claim to me
Knowing somehow none could take me
Watching the sun come up in vain
The only reason I can find why I remained
The need to leave the point I came to again and again

It didn't matter how hard I tried
It took so long to claim that I knew how
Or what it meant to let go of this
To ever say goodbye
Call it destiny, call it fate
Chose my direction, running forward
Each life to learn anew, whatever may come

I cannot turn my feelings down
Beyond my means to turn my thoughts around
Expressed in every word I will ever speak
Brighter than all the stars combined
More than the waters, earth and sky
All that I wish and all that I dream
No creed on earth can replace or provide
In my darkest hour, the comfort I'd feel
Leading me to see I can be more than I expect of me
My beginning and my end
The first and last air that I breathe
More than the sum of everything that I will ever be

Reflections...

2008-09-23T22:10:00.004-04:00


















The dawn is breaking
new day shining through
climbing out of the darkness of night
dreaming of wholeness
complete and free
realizing that even the best fall down sometimes
fragile threads bringing us closer
across the miles
free in the heart and mind
through the darkness
flying in my heart to where you are
kaleidescope of possibilities
colliding on a parallel journey
discovering a new amazing world

I sit alone quiet with sacred stillness
dreaming of  soaring free
reflections of spirit
always hoping, always longing
going to places, seeing faces
I grieve for my own spirit
deep hurt and fulfillment
yet I crack a smile
life is still good
the stars are still shining
only time will answer
heal the pain
of what life has put me through
seasons change
life can begin again
hope, dream discover
one truth remains
I am still me..and I am going to get me back

-L

what are these tortured screams?

2008-09-22T12:10:00.004-04:00

I have decided to deem myself grand charleton of the north American zoological freedom society...see..my brother things he's hot shit...with the damn (CLF) Camelid liberation front...and yet he fails. Left all the damn llamas and alpacas in Chile alone...with their needs unfulfilled. What the hell kind of ambassador is that? Say you are going to help them and then abandon them and let them fail on the desolate plains of starvation with the peasants! Erock=fails. I will free one tortured animal per day until my mission is complete...can you say the same? NO. You pale in comparison to my greatness. Off playing with grizzly bears and pushing your bike through mud...like it's important. Meanwhile the meek of the Earth are neglected and destitute.

Whatever...my mission begins.

I'm a damn Andean condor ffs...get me out of here ! I'm the largest bird of prey in the world...wingspan is 10 feet...get me the fuck out of this cage! I will free it...calling the Smithsonian as we speak to liberate it and set its spirit free. At the very least I will arrange better dead animals for it to eat. GFY!

Blog ressurection!

2008-09-21T16:22:00.006-04:00

The blog lives!!! Random rambings commence! Family is healed on the surface which relieves massive stress and drama...life is going ok..health is shit but mind is free and when we can dream we are free and limitation crumbles into oblivion! More later...

"It takes courage to push yourself to places that you have never been before... to test your limits... to break through barriers. And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." Anais Nin

The strongest of all warriors are these two - Time and Patience. Leo Tolstoi The past is an illusion. You must learn to live in the present and accept yourself for what you are now.

"The Strongest of Stones"
The most beautiful of stones have been tossed by the wind, washed by the waves, and polished to brilliance by life's strongest storms.

Latest thoughts are centered around this lmao!!! NAO (FITHGTE!)

Nights in Rodanthe

2008-07-27T23:26:00.000-04:00

Been a long timeeeee since bloggage!
Well crazy summer's almost over and I'll get back into random thoughts.

But for now!
OMG Nicholas Sparks new book/movie Nights in Rodanthe is coming out soon!

http://nightsinrodanthe.warnerbros.com/

Richard Gere and Diane Lane have great chemistry...if you've seen Unfaithful you know what I mean! Looking forward to this one...!
pzpz

crazy ones!

2008-05-28T00:00:00.000-04:00

Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The trouble-makers. The round heads in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules, and they have no respect for the
status-quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify, or vilify them. But the only thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.-Jack Keruac

Time to Heal

2008-05-21T15:41:00.000-04:00

Ted Hibbard

It takes time to heal.

Build a bridge
from now to tomorrow.
Sink the piers
deep into the Earth.
Pour in concrete
day by day,
a little at a time,
and let it set.

It takes time to heal.

It may feel very awkward,
as if you're making empty promises,
as if you're simply spanning empty space.

But someday, somehow, somewhere,
you'll find yourself
upon a brand new shore,
glancing back at the bridge
which you alone have built.

It takes time to heal.

A Daughter's Pain

2008-04-11T01:04:00.005-04:00

Daddy, it never occurred to me.
That you might never change your ways.
I guess it was the little girl in me.
That always thought that you’d change someday.

You’d change and become that father I always wished for
You’d give me advice, love me unconditionally
You’d make me proud to tell people who you were
And you’d also be proud of me.

I’d look forward to being with you,
And you’d look forward to time with me,
You’d plan neat outings
Or we’d just watch TV

We’d look forward to vacations
With stability and peace of mind
We’d all want to go
Nobody would be left behind
Instead we were scared
afraid of when the yelling would start

You’d actually listen when I spoke
You’d admit when you were wrong
You’d treat your family with respect
A family man you’d be
You’d know all about me
Including all of my dreams

Still, inside, I know that you cared about me
A few good things I remember
But I wish with regards to mental illness
That you would not have just surrendered.
A control freak and angry abusive man til the bitter end
You made me sick, scared and alone
full of fear and dread
It’s easy to point fingers for you,
blame everyone but yourself
Again and again and again
It’s also easy for me
to dream about what could have been.

Verbal abuse is a destroyer
Broken bones heal
words linger for life
So much wasted time
A beautiful, loving vibrant woman, destoyed by your ugliness
Your cherade is over now, nobody is buying the "nice guy" act anymore
I whisper and pray every night, ’Please don’t let me become the same.’

The pity that I feel inside for you
For all the crappy things you have put us through
With all of your verbal abuse and rage
For every tear that left our eyes
This anger has completely taken over you
No more will I continue to let this be
I will not let you hurt us anymore
I made that promise to myself, I swore
You have done enough to lose my trust
I now look at you with pity and disgust
You have scarred our family for the rest of our lives
I can see just how much every time I look into their eyes
Tell me how it is that you live each and everyday
Knowing that you did that and made them us hurt this way
Always scared, hurt, sad, and mad
How could you ever call yourself a dad.

Goodbye "Dad"

Abuse is about control and the fear of losing it. Ill-treatment is an absurd effort to maintain and enhance the abuser's hegemony - social, cultural, legal, and, above all, psychological. Abusers exploit, lie, insult, demean, ignore (the "silent treatment"), manipulate, and control. There are a million ways to abuse, directly and by proxy. To expect too much, to denigrate, to ignore - are all modes of abuse. There is physical abuse, verbal abuse, psychological abuse, sexual abuse. The list is long. Most abusers abuse surreptitiously. They are "stealth abusers". You have to actually live with one in order to witness the mistreatment.

You've no doubt heard the adage, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me." Well, it's not true. Name-calling hurts -- especially when the person doing it is a parent, a teacher, or a coach. Hollering and flashing your temper might strike you as a natural and effective form of discipline if you were brought up with it. But for children it may cause emotional trauma that results in long-lasting harm. Among other things, verbal abuse can undermine your child's self-esteem, damage his ability to trust and form relationships, and chip away at his academic and social skills. In fact, current research shows that verbal abuse of children can be just as destructive emotionally as physical and sexual abuse and puts them in as much risk for depression and anxiety.

What is verbal abuse?

You may be verbally abusing your child if you are doing any of the following:

•Name-calling, belittling, swearing, insulting. ("You are stupid." "You're a rotten kid.") Indirect criticism, such as disparaging your child to your spouse, also hurts. Just because you're not berating your child directly doesn't mean he doesn't hear it and feel the sting.

•Rejecting or threatening with abandonment. ("I wish you'd never been born." "I should put you up for adoption.") This kind of verbal abuse creates a sense that your child doesn't belong -- and isn't wanted -- in the family.

•Threatening bodily harm. Studies have linked verbal aggression and physical aggression: A 1989 Harvard study found, for example, that "parents who yell frequently are the ones most likely to hit frequently, and vice versa." Even if you don't act on violent threats, they may make your child fear you and distrust you.

•Scapegoating or blaming. ("You're the reason this family is such a mess." "If I didn't have to take care of you, I could have a better life." "If you weren't so clumsy, your sister wouldn't have gotten hurt.") Your child will think he's a bad person who deserves to be unhappy.

•Using sarcasm. Making a mocking remark, such as "Now that was smart" when he spills grape juice on the rug, might seem like a way to avoid direct criticism, but your child is perceptive enough to understand that you're demeaning him.

•Berating your spouse. A study at the University of Maryland, Baltimore County, determined that children who see their parents verbally abusing each other are more likely to be depressed or anxious, and to experience more interpersonal problems of their own. Interestingly, the study also found that verbal aggression between parents was more traumatic to children than physical violence between parents.

How common is verbal abuse?

Reports are mixed. A study at the University of New Hampshire found that 63 percent of more than 3,000 American parents surveyed reported one or more cases of verbal aggression toward children in their homes. However, a Child Protective Services study determined that only 6 percent of all child abuse cases involved "emotional maltreatment" (of which verbal abuse is the most common form). The fact that signs of verbal abuse are harder to recognize and prove than signs of physical abuse may account for the seemingly low number of "official" verbal abuse cases.

What are signs that a child is suffering from verbal abuse?

•Negative self-image. This is the most common and pervasive effect of verbal abuse. Your child may say things like, "I'm stupid," or, "Nobody likes me." Or he may simply seem withdrawn, sullen, or depressed, all of which can be signs of a poor self-image. In defining emotional abuse, the National Committee for the Prevention of Child Abuse says that it "attacks a child's... sense of self-worth."

•Self-destructive acts. "Cutting" (using razor blades or knives to cut his own skin) and all forms of self-injury signal a problem, as do other reckless activities that put your child in danger.

•Antisocial behavior. The New Hampshire study found that verbally abused children demonstrated higher rates of physical aggression, delinquency, and interpersonal problems. Your child may hit other children, frequently quarrel with his classmates, or be cruel to (or even torture) animals.

•Delayed development. The slowdown may appear in your child's physical, social, academic, or emotional development. He may have difficulty making friends, fall behind in school, or engage in regressive acts such as rocking, bed-wetting, and thumb-sucking.

Does verbal abuse do any long-term harm?

Yes. Research shows that abused children are more likely to:

•become victims of abuse later in life

•become abusive themselves

•become depressed and self-destructive later in life

•develop anxiety

Why can't I seem to control my temper?

Most parents at some time find themselves feeling frustrated and angry with their children. This is normal. Occasionally they say things they regret -- to their children, their spouses, or their friends. This, too, is normal. But if you find that you are routinely having angry outbursts or that whenever you're frustrated you lash out at those around you in the ways described above -- then you need to get help. (Please keep in mind that if you feel overwhelmed by your anger, you may want to consider getting help from a counselor, psychotherapist, or mental health professional trained in anger management.) Meanwhile, here are some ways to begin helping yourself.

To start getting a handle on your outbursts, try to understand the reasons behind your behavior. The following are some of the more common explanations for verbally abusive behavior:

•a failure to understand that there are other ways to discipline and communicate with your child

•the belief that verbal abuse is necessary as a form of "tough love"

•an inability to control strong emotions

•a history of verbal abuse by parents, teachers, and other adults

What can I do to avoid verbally abusing my child?

In moments of stress and anger, try to refrain from saying anything mean or sarcastic to your child. Remember, you're his main and most important role model. If you tend to fall apart, lose your cool, and act abusively at challenging times, you'll likely raise a child who does the same.

Here are some ways you can calm yourself down:

•Take a "time-out." This method works as well for adults as it does for kids. If your child can be left alone, go to another room. If he's too young for that, try walking to the other end of the room. Then take a few slow, deep breaths, seeking to let go of the situation emotionally. Wait five minutes (or more if you need it) before talking to your child.

•Share your feelings of resentment or anger with your spouse or a friend. Be sure to do this in private, where your child won't hear you and feel wounded by your words.

•Try to deal only with the present rather than letting all the stressful incidents that have "piled up" overcome your emotions.

In addition, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends using what it calls the RETHINK method to bring your feelings under control. RETHINK stands for:

•R ecognize your feelings.

•E mpathize with your child.

•T hink of the situation differently. (Try using humor.)

•H ear what your child is saying.

•I ntegrate your love with your angry thoughts.

•N otice your body's reactions to feeling anger and to calming down.

•K eep your attention on the present problem.

break the cycle...stop walking on eggshells and say goodbye to the pain!

Happy Easter

2008-03-22T17:23:00.005-04:00

Happy Easter Everyone! Yay Bunnies!!!
Well, Hudson did not win his plee, and he is now altered. He recovered fast too. It's cute because he still looks like he has little balls, they left them on, just did a vasectomy. He is mad at the world though and thinks humans are unfair to play God with him that way. Hopefully Min is not knocked up because of their pre-chop chop sexual ventures.

Thoughts from the deep

2008-03-13T20:23:00.000-04:00

It happens....
the voices and choices
are too much at times
and I need a quiet place
just me and the moon
or me and the sky
a place where I can hear myself think
reminding me to breathe
asking me to 'hold on'
and when I hear this
I know everything will be fine.
Look for strength within
Guide yourself higher
dont stop dreaming

-L

Plee for Hudson

2008-03-07T03:08:00.004-05:00

Well, in light of his recent sexual activities and possible impregnation of his sister, I made an appointment for the lil' man to get his balls cut off next week. He's really pissed off about it and wants to retain his wholeness.

I will let him speak his mind, but they are still getting cut off. Im fuckin bored so why not write something retarded.

Hudson: Listan u mizarabal humnan beans go fuk off cuz i am keepin my balls i haff ownlee jast discoverat my peniss and i refuz to have u take my manhood.

My little studmuffin

2008-03-05T01:13:00.003-05:00

Good lord! My babe is growing up!
My innocent kitten is becoming a man cat. I am so upset, somebody send me something, somebody do something. Tonight my little man Hudson did something shocking and sick. I was playing q3 online with a bunch of crazy fun people and all of a sudden I heard this death moan. I look over on my bed and see my little angel Hudson violently thrusting away on top of his sister! Jesus Christ!
Poor Min got raped tonight!

Somebody is going to the vet tomorrow for a snip snipping! My babe!

Mountains of powder

2008-03-02T02:07:00.007-05:00

The snow around my house is now so high I cannot see my neighbors house! We literally have 15 foot high walls of snow all over the place! Not much else to do but write articles, and play with my kitten. My babe is basking in his own goldness... not much else to do! My boy sleeps like he is running..its funny to watch. My babe had a sinus infection and part of his treatment is steam twice day, so basically he takes showers with me. This is how cute he looks from the point of view inside the shower.

I shall Ski

2008-02-19T22:29:00.008-05:00

I rule, plain and simple. After not skiing since A-Basin over 5 years ago, today I was victorious and annihilated the black diamond (hardest) run at my local mountain. After mucking around on the bunny hill with my retarded friends, I decided I needed a true inspirational awesome me moment. So, I bolted, and just went for it. I went up to the top, skied down to the double lift and up to the hardest trails on the mountain. I have not forgotten how to ski because I owned the mountain and I never fell, not once. The top was sheer ice and crazy icy powdery sliding fun. I watched other people fall and laughed at how good I was doing. My knees were pissed off at me and my feet were burning but it was a GOOD pain. I thought to myself, even if I fall right now and snap my arm or break or pull something, go through a word of hurt, end up in the Emergency room, that it would all be from doing a good and grand and Epic thing, doing something fun, for me and only for me.

How crazy is it that I could think that going to the Emergency room with a broken leg could constitute "fun." I am dead serious, I would laugh at it. Of course I do not need more pain and suffering but it would be a "good" injury that happened doing something "good."

You folks have no idea how much I have suffered and how each day presents so many challenges. Add up the challenges, the obstacles, the near death experiences, every day for the most part over 8 years of my life so far and you get one big clusterfuck of pain and broken identity.Well, I have remained positive and inspired and upbeat to still be able to smile and laugh at everything I have been through. Let me tell you, it is shining moments like today, high above the clouds, looking down at my town, looking over to where my sweet Lini is buried in the woods a few miles away...remembering all the sadness and heartbreak of the past few months, and remembering, reflecting rather, at how it is these few precious moments of victory that make all the days, months, years of pain and suffering all worthwhile.

As i stood at the top of the mountain, alone, the very top...with all my outdoor gear on and my badass ski goggles, clenched the ski poles in my hands, and soared off down the hill...fearless. I seriously felt fearless. I was not afraid to fall, and if I did i would not care or give a shit if I got hurt. My legs burned and throbbed and it felt so amazing to be using muscles and feeling alive again. I need more moments like these. they are WAY too far between. i get one or 2 of these per year and that is NOT enough to sustain eternal optimism.

I rule and I am officially addicted to skiing again. Somebody buy me skis, boots, bindings and poles please. I am gonna be addicted to skiing in winter now and trout fishing all summer.

I rule.

Donkey Mania

2008-02-06T21:01:00.002-05:00

What a wonderful weekend.
I went to see the Banff Film Festival in Vermont with my wonderful outdoor Diva Mom. On the way there we passed by a donkey farm with ONE HUNDRED Miniature donkeys. I love donkeys so it was an extraordinary sight! Got some pictures from afar.

Went to the festival which was cool when we finally found the old church where it was being held. :)
Walked around Burlington and saw the old office on Church Street where I used to work for the Audubon Society 7 years ago. That was cool!

On the way home through the Champlain Valley we stopped again at the donkey farm. This time we saw a farm hand and he invited us in to see the little donkeys! There were seriously about 200 miniature donkeys in total. We went back into the bard an we saw the baby donkey foals only 2 months old.

Then we got to watch then feed and roll in the hay.

I got to pet a ton of mini donkeys and Mom got to pet them too. We even saw one get picked up they are such friendly creatures. Beautiful eyelashes.

Someday I am gonna own atleast 2 of them. They are so DUMB its bloody funny!

Seeing these mini donkeys was just so awesome! Dream come true to see so many together! HAHAHAAA!!! ROFL

You Raise me Up

2008-02-02T16:47:00.000-05:00

K..this Josh Groban song gets to me...and I want to thank all the people in my life who have helped support me in all my hard times. Love you all! :) xD L

.....................................................................................

When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;
When troubles come and my heart burdened be;
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit awhile with me.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.

There is no life - no life without its hunger;
Each restless heart beats so imperfectly;
But when you come and I am filled with wonder,
Sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up: To more than I can be.

The list

2008-01-18T15:49:00.003-05:00

I need to vent my shit!

there are too many things i wanna do in this life..and not enough time!
The earth is so awesome...too many awesome places to see!
Somebody do something!

Plus...I need/want a travel buddy and im getting annoyed with the current state of boringness that is surrounding me! SOS send cool people to me!!! Susie..Jen...Adam...Eric....Ben fuckin help me over here!

Im rambing but...

this list is too damn big,.
volcanoes
mountains
caves
seas
space

help me see it all!

Do something!
SOS
:) L

The return of Hudson

2008-01-13T14:46:00.001-05:00

Hudson is back home, and he is doing great! he has not sneezed since he has been home...horray!
In light of this...he deserves some awards.

My babes

2008-01-11T02:14:00.002-05:00

My kitten Hudson (the boy) has been sick with a sinus infection for almost 2 months now. Despite 2 rounds of antibiotics, he is still sick so the vet suggested he undergo 3 days of nebulizer treatment with steroids and antibiotics. Hope it works! It's so hard having my new babe away from home, and it's sooo quiet. Pissing me off cause he is the only thing i live with that i actually like! LMAO

I went to visit Hudson at the vet today and it was the most adorable thing ever. He was so exited to see me, he was like a little child...hugging me, kissing me, purring, it was beyond adorable. I have never seen a more affectionate kitten in my life, he was literally hugging me. The vet staff commented on how cute he is and how he is the sweetest kitty in the place. I got to visit him for 1/2 hour in a room and play with him and his toys. We told him what a big boy he is being and how proud of him we are. He has 2 more days of nebulizers with antibiotics and steroids. I swear I dont want kids...this lil fella is enough, and thank christ hes a boy too! never thought i could like a cat this much..now i'm in love with the lil guy. Hope he doesnt die ...! Im jinxed! Hudson ftw!

When Hudson was tiny...he had a little limp from jumping off the couch. Isn't he cute?

When he was tiny, he loves to play in his baby basket with his mice.

Happy New Year

2008-01-01T22:11:00.002-05:00

Went to New York City for New Year's Eve!
I saw pretty trees and pretay lights on dah trees.
We saw a very very large tree too, in Rockafella centah. We went to dah Top of da Rock and saw the whole world and the new year's Eve BALL.We looked up high and saw God and baby Jezuz.I saw grand Central Station, it was pretay.We took da choo choo train home and I cried about Eric leaving and the Linus dying on the way home. I am misunderstood.

Happy 2008!

The Gunks

2007-12-30T19:36:00.001-05:00

Today was a nice day hiking a snowy icy trail at Mohonk Preserve in the Gunks.
I wish i was super healthy and in shape and could do some rock climbing because the place is killer for that shit. I miss my old life...dammit! I could do anything life. Waa...Well, we had a nice day and ate gingerbread men in the woods with the family. Mitten came along too, and although he was cold, he had a nice time watching some guys bouldering near the trail. I took a few pictures of the neat rock formationshere are a few climbing shots of Epic Eric in da Gunks.

Day at Da Zoo

2007-12-29T15:06:00.001-05:00

We went to da zoo yestaday!
I saw a beautiful baby giraffe
It was fun and a nice sunny day and I walked far in my shoes.
We had lunch with da bears.Things were normal for the most part...until we entered the reptile house
After that, things went downhill...
Mom got attacked by a red fox

After trying to rescue Mom, Eric swooped in and defended Mama against the ferocious beast . Unfortunately he got attacked too, and got a sucking flesh wound ion his neck that required a visit to first aid. stitches and all, we were still not safe...and an eagle tried to kill Eric.

Things were looking dreary, and then this giant T-rex emerged from the earth and Eric had to fight it off with his karate skillsThen I spotted champie, the Lake champlain monster...and had my way with it.Then came the World of Darkness...Eric was afraid to go in, but we dragged him under force. Inside, we spotted the elusive sand cat. It was a grand day, one we escaped with our lives, and then we had pizza.

Christmas

2007-12-26T16:06:00.001-05:00

Merry Christmas!! We had a nice holidays this year with family and my babies. Wonderful to see my kindred spirit, my sibling again. After all, we share 50% the same DNA, oh dear.

We made cookies and stolen and gingerbread houses. We watched Moonraker and had some laughs at our old friend "Jaws". Played Quake alot and lounged with family. Watched Grandma sit on the couch all day and felt sad about it. She is getting so old now, almost 97 and has lost the will to live. Sad to see, and feeling pretty helpless. Had a nice visit with my cousin and Aunt and Uncle too. Mitten sang Christmas carols to all of us on Christmas Eve, what a wonderful donkey he is. The best was when Hudson and Marcy came down with their Daddy for Christmas Eve and Christmas day! It was very important to meet their Uncle Eric and Uncle Peter, both of whom appreciate and respect the Linus species very much. Mini and Hudson with Uncle Eric

In all seriousness

2007-12-15T23:31:00.001-05:00

Listen, this blog may seem kinda boring and depressing but that will change as I get my health back and get back to causing trouble in the wilderness. I have EPIC things on my list too, so there! You see I am EPIC at heart and soul and I am strong as fucking shit, so you just wait this blog will get better and I will make it happy and exiting and fucking great!

Watch this right now...this is me!

training

2007-10-22T14:50:00.001-04:00

Been working out hard with a trainer at the Gym, trying to recover my strength and endurance after years of chronic illness. It's not easy, and my heart is so out of shape it's not funny. I have bad neurocardiogenic syncope, and so I get lightheaded really easily as my blood pressure drops so it's not easy. My gym has FitLinxx which is computerized equipment all individualized to each person. I am off to a good start and hoping to do this 3x per week plus take a class the next semester. I go in the sauna and steamroom to try to boost the toxin removal and kill some malaria. Everytime I start something new, i get too sick to continue so please...
Wish me luck!

October beauty

2007-10-06T10:11:00.001-04:00

Beautiful autumn is upon us in the Adirondacks. I took off to the high peaks to camp and had a wonderful week. I went to write and work..and escape ..well...everything! It rained, but I still caught a mess of brook trout and managed some nice hikes and a trip to the new ADK Wild Center in Tupper Lake.

Had a glorious sunny day at the ADK VIC center at Paul Smith's.

Here are some pics of that.

Set yourself free

2007-09-27T19:33:00.002-04:00

Set yourself free

Set yourself free from anything that might hinder you in becoming the person you want to be. Free yourself from the uncertainties about your abilities or the worth of your dreams, from the fears that you may not be able to achieve them or that they won't be what you wanted.

Set yourself free from the past. The good things from yesterday are still yours in memory; the things you want to forget you will, for tomorrow is only a sunrise away. Free yourself from regret or guilt, and promise to live this day as fully as you can.

Set yourself free from the expectations of others, and never feel guilty or embarrassed if you do not live up to their standards. You are most important to yourself; live by what you feel is best and right for you. Others will come to respect your integrity and honesty.

Set yourself free to simply be yourself, and you will soar higher than you've ever dreamed.

pz :)

The Creed to Live By

2007-09-21T16:19:00.000-04:00

Don't undermine your self worth by comparing yourself to others
it is because we are different that each of us is special.

Don't set your goals by what other people deem important;
only you know what's best for you.

Don't take for granted the things closest to your heart;
cling to them as you would your own life, for without them, life is meaningless.

Don't let life slip through your fingers by living in the past or for the future,
by living your life one day at a time you live all the days of your life.

Don't give up when you still have something to give
Nothing is really over until the moment you stop trying.

Don't be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect;
it is this fragile thread that binds us to each other.

Don't be afraid to encounter risks,
it is by taking chances that we
learn to be brave.

Don't diminish your dreams
to be without deams is to be without hope,
to be without hope is to be without purpose.
Don't run through life so fast that you forget not only where you have been
but where you are going, life is not a race, but a journey to be savored every step of the way

Isle de Hoo

2007-08-30T19:33:00.001-04:00

Had a wonderful trip to Maine with my best friend, the woman who gave me life, my Mama!
We drove to Stonington, camped out by the seashore at Old Quarry Ocean Adventures kayak place. the next morning we took the Mink (pictured)

to Isle au Haut (which means High Island in French)

It is a place I have spent a great deal of happy wonderful family times as a child.
My family and I used to go up to Maine every summer and hike all over the rocky beaches and explore the sea life. The only word that comes to mind is "Nostaligia"

We had perfect weather, and a lovely time together laughing and relaxing in a true wilderness.
One of the highlights was hiking Eben's head and the old road hiking trails with my backpack on! It's been a LONG time (7 years) since I last hiked with my backpack on. Think about that folks, My identity was missing for a loooooongt time! It's back now, and I intend to fully restore it!

Rainbow Lake

2007-08-10T15:14:00.001-04:00

A beautiful and inspiring week at our camp on Rainbow Lake.

As we do every year, we traveled up with my Grandmother, who is an amazing 96 years old.

We stayed in the long cabin, and spent out days down by the water and the docks and the campfire circle. I made huge fires with newly felled paper birch trees. Days were spent hearing stories from years gone by, and learning the wisdom that only a 96 years old can share.

I find it very easy to relate to my sharp as ever, hasn't forgotten a thing, still strong as hell in spirit Grandmother. Perhaps it is because, she, much like myself, feels trapped inside her body. the physical body brings limitations, and with that, sadness and a longing for restoration of the soul. I can relate to her, and her to me, as we recognize that true strength and survivorship comes from within. It is not what you do, or who you do it with that makes you great. It is you, all of you. Your limitations, and despite them, you press on, and make the most of life, broken shell of being or not, identity missing, doesn't matter. Our eyes show no age, and our spirit's are strong. We are still alive, and as we watched the embers of the fire glow against the crisp darkness of the August sky, nothing else seemed to matter.

As we said goodbye to the lake, and the loons that were our constant companions, I looked back and caught the moment of a lifetime. There was my 96 year old grandma, a living legend, sitting by herself on the last step of the dock with an expression I had never before seen.
I snapped this photo just before I realized she had tears in her eyes.

I had never seen my Grandmother cry, or even act vulnerable for that matter. I realized I was witnessing a very sacred and special moment. I sat beside her and put my arm around her, and she was indeed crying.

After a long silence...I said
" I am proud of you Grandma. "

She responded with a shy smile "yeah, I am proud of me too." she said.

I knew she felt that she may never be back, and with a long winter ahead, and at 96, she may never go camping again, or see her favorite places in the Adirondacks.

It was a bittersweet end to a beautiful week with family, one I will always remember and cherish.

inner peace

2007-06-14T22:55:00.001-04:00

I had a great weekend fishing solo for brook trout. Perfect weather, and a great trip!
I took a ton of pictures, and some videos of 2 loons that came right up close to my canoe.
It was heaven to be back in the wilderness alone.
I got up at 5 am on Sunday morning and paddled out into the misty lake. The only way I can describe the beauty and magic of this sacred place is that I was going to see God..well atleast church. The lake was perfectly still, as the morning mist danced all around me.

As the sun began to rise, the magical place transformed into an oasis of tranquil beauty.

The haunting echo of the loon call brought me a deep mental cleanse and an energizing aura of hope and confidence.

I'll handle "it"

2007-06-01T15:04:00.001-04:00

I like this quote, and I am reminded by it that in daily life, we face many fears. In fact, the most dangerous thing we do is get behind the wheel of a car. We assume we have control over the driving experience, when, in fact, we don't. When you get scared, just say to yourself, "I'll handle it."

"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself. "I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along."

craving wilderness

2007-05-24T00:05:00.001-04:00

I really miss the woods! I need to get back out there for an extended time. I've been feeling like a yoyo with my work, and I miss getting out into the woods. I miss the silence of nature, and listening only to the sounds of a crackling campfire, and the loons calling under the moonlight of the misty sacred still waters of my favorite mountain lake.
I need to go back there....soon.
I try to get away as much as possible for solo fishing trips and some camping. I really want to stay out there for at least a week, and not hear phones ring, not hear cars, or see any streetlights...I need to get back immersed into nature and renew my spirit. I used to thrive on pushing myself, and getting a rush of physical exertion. These days, I am grateful just to be outside, even sitting still in my canoe, looking around at the scenery. Besides, it is the sides of the mountains that give it beauty, not the summit. It's the journey, not the end goal. I just want to have more happy, fun moments...and so I can pray that the rest of the summer can give me a few sunny, good fishing days to hold me over through the rest of my "other" days.

Sacred Stillness....

Starting over!

2007-05-13T18:34:00.002-04:00

Well my computer crashed during a lightning storm and I lost all my data and images so I am starting over! Be in touch soon! :) Lini lost a tooth too lol. Lightening hates meeeeee! Somebody DO SOMETHING its after me ffs!

Fishing trip and some drama

2007-05-07T16:39:00.001-04:00

After a long and crazy winter, I finally got out fishing alone. I headed out to my church place...known simply as "trout pond" because it's location is secret. Anyway, brought my Radisson canoe and camping gear and headed out at 6 am on Saturday morning. Spent all day on the water catching fat brook trout. The wind was ripping pretty hard and I was having a hard time controlling 2 trolling fishing poles, and 2 oars at the same time...need 4 hands. It was so great to be out again After a long winter, with more health crap going on..it sure is nice to break out and get back to livinnngggg!!!

After a great day on the water, I headed off to the leanto/shelter for the night. I had to stop at my college and sign in, to open the campground gate, and thats when the weird shit started happenning. I noticed when I pulled up to the area early that morning that the entrance to the college was roped off and fire trucks and firemen were at the entrance. I paid no real attention. When I was fishing I saw 2 helicopters flying very low over me. Then when I went to sign in at the college, security was acting very strange. They told me I needed to go to the Administration building and talk to Alumni affairs. I said"It's Saturday, someobody is over there?" he said "Yes, there is definetly somebody over there." So whatever, I walked over there. On the way, there was a kid on his cellphone red in the face crying his ass off and I heard him say "They found him at the bottom of the fucking lake...sob...sob.."

Jesus. So then I go to the Admin building and walk right in the front door to see a man and a women, on a couch, crying and shaking and screaming. I knew somebody must have died..and I was witnessing something awful. I quickly walked past the parents, and upstairs to find cops at the Presidents office. A cop asked me what I was doing there, and I told him, then he took down my name and info, and told me to leave the building that an emergency was happening but he was not "at liberty to say what happened." As I was walking out, another set of parents and a sibling came through, and were crying. I have never heard anybody sobbing so hard in pain in my life. Obviously, they had just learned their son was dead, moments before I got there. She was grabbing the cop and hugging him...while the Dad said "Are you sure?"

Jesus.

Why the hell did I have to walk in and see that, and interrupt such a private and horrific moment. Why did that idiot at security tell me to go over to that building? I can't get the image of the parents crying out of my head. I was like...Im outta here! So i went into town to my friends house. I played with his dog til he came home and we found out from a guy at the gas station that 2 canoes went out late at night 11 pm on the lake and flipped over on Friday night. They had just found the first body when I walked in there, and the other boy was still missing. So, back to security I went, and the said "campground is closed tonight, we have a crime scene.."

The next morning I went back to the trout pond, one lake away from where this was happening. The firemen were still there, and an ambulance, the cops, so they hadn't found the second body yet. After another great day of fishing, and 12 more fat trout, I left the area, and headed home, noting on my way out, all the cops and stuff were gone at 6 pm. Reading the paper this morning, they found the second boy on Sunday afternoon while we were fishing, and it was an accidental drowning. What the heck were they doing on the lake at 11 pm when the ice just went out 3 days ago and the water was barely 40 degrees? Were they college canoes? Why didn't they have life jackets on? Were they drunk? the last day of classes was Friday...a party?

What a crazy weekend. I wish I hadn't seen what I saw, I really wish I never saw that.

Glad I did not camp at the campground without checking in because that would have been all kinds of drama.Very sad thing....very stupid thing...very senseless...
The kids were drinking, had no life jackets, wore cotton, went out after dark, in 40 degree water, with overloaded canoes, on a windy night....lots of stupid things. Still sucks though.
So, in closing, the fishing was great! Freezer's full!

Don't Quit

2007-04-27T21:12:00.000-04:00

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will.
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low, and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When are is pressing you down a bit,
Rest if you must, but don't you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As everyone of us sometimes learns.
And many a failure turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up though the pace seems slow,
You may succeed with another blow.
Success is failure turned inside out,
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are.
It may be near when it seems so far,
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit.
It's when things seem worse, that you must not quit.

Welcome!

2007-04-26T16:47:00.001-04:00

Greetings...and welcome to Sacred Rivers blog.

It's a chilly spring day in the Adirondacks! So I am sitting in front of the computer thinking, stumbled upon blogger, decided why not, been working, playing games and being creative! This will be a happy blog, about the random fun things I get to do, which are few and far between because I don't have nearly enough fun. Stay tuned for some hopefully exiting trout fishing stories this summer.
I'll post some of my photography and some nature writings, plus random thoughts on life, love and the planet. Pz out.